Amelia Reyes Mora: “Communicating is not just talking. It is persuading, connecting and building trust”

• Psychologist and communications expert Amelia Reyes Mora tells Listín Diario that speaking well in public is something you learn, and that stage fright can be managed with practice.

In an interview with Listín Diario, Reyes answers some of the main questions that come up around speaking in public or commanding a stage, especially at a time when most people want to express their views and opinions.

Many people have felt afraid of speaking in public, or have gone blank during a presentation, more than once.

Some still do not dare stand in front of a crowd because they believe that speaking well and commanding a stage are things you are born with.

But psychologist and public relations and communications expert Amelia Reyes Mora explains that speaking well in public is something you learn, since nobody is born knowing how. Today, in an interview with Listín Diario, she answers some of the main questions that come up around speaking in public or commanding a stage.

Can the fear of public speaking be overcome?

In my experience, always. Even if it never disappears completely, it stops controlling you. I have felt nervous myself before going on stage, and the difference is that you learn to manage it. That can be trained. Nobody speaks well in public without having practised, made mistakes and adjusted.

Where does it begin Where does that process begin?

With knowing yourself. Before talking about technique, we do a self-assessment exercise: how you move, how you sound, what gestures you make when you are nervous without realising it. That self-knowledge is the first step.

What mistakes do leaders make most often when they speak?

We generally focus on content and ignore something just as important: the delivery. When there is coherence between what you say, how you say it and how you move, the message lands with all its force.

A leader who knows the subject inside out but speaks looking at the floor, with arms crossed, a monotone rhythm and filler words, loses credibility without knowing it. The body and the voice do not accompany the message, they define it.

How do you get rid of filler words?

First you have to identify them, because almost nobody hears them in themselves. Recording yourself is the best exercise. Once you spot them, you need to pause in order to think: practise a three-second pause. Where you used to put an “um” or a “you know”, put silence. It feels uncomfortable at first, but the audience reads it as confidence.

Does eye contact really matter that much?

It is extremely powerful. Looking at people, not at the ceiling or the slides, creates connection and conveys conviction. Ideally you hold someone’s gaze for three to five seconds, moving your eyes around the whole room as you speak.

Why do some people go blank just as they start presenting?

Because they try to remember a text instead of mastering ideas. When you memorise word for word, any stumble disconnects you. What works is having a clear structure of ideas, not of sentences, and practising out loud.

I also recommend the 4-7-8 breathing technique before going out in front of an audience: breathe in for 4 seconds, hold for 7 and breathe out for 8. It is simple and very effective at bringing anxiety down.

And what about the fear of being judged? Social media seems to have multiplied it

Yes, the scrutiny has intensified. Today anything can be recorded and shared. But the answer is simple: prepare better. Authenticity is still what connects most. People do not remember whoever was perfect, they remember whoever was genuine and clear.

What makes a leader memorable when they speak?

Authenticity. People do not remember perfect presentations, they remember whoever spoke to them for real. Clarity, a well-told story and genuine emotion will be memorable.

What would you say to an executive who thinks this does not apply to them because they “already speak well”?

That communicating is not just talking. It is persuading, mobilising, connecting and building trust. In business, the ability to communicate with impact decides whether a project is approved, whether a team pulls together, whether a client trusts you. Leaders who understand that and work on it have a real advantage over those who do not.